I’ve always been curious about mediums.
It always seemed so cool, this idea that you could speak with some spiritual guide and see the future. Like a real life super power.
Also, how convenient.
Not sure where to take your next play?
Not clear on what you should do next?
Not sure if spending all of your money in registering for that festival is the right thing for you?
Ask your guides.
With my paralysing fear of decisions-making, getting some straight answers from heaven would have helped me sort out my messy life.
No more tossing and turning at night over whether or not I was making the right decision: some omnisicent invisible witch would be guiding me step by step towards success, money and love. Magical….
And then there’s the fierce mistrust of charlatans, which in France is deeply rooted in our pride of separating the spiritual and the secular.
With a medium jokingly referred to a “Madame Irma”, an ageless, tootheless gypsie waiting for you on the steps of their trailers with a crystal ball, while she presses you with questions and tells you what you want to hear. For the delicious sum of EUR500.
And as I spoke to people around me about it, it doesn’t seem to be a French thing only.
And that’s where I was on the subject.
Until life sent me a medium.
No, 2 mediums.
Over the course of 2 days.
No crystal ball, no chiffon, no heavy make up, no tarot card.
Just a straightforward woman on a skype call with plain language and a little buddha statue behind her. She’s been studying mediumship for years, even has degrees (who knew psychic-mediumship training existed?)
She starts straight away.
She asks if I have question and when I say no, she replies “Ok, I’ll just tell you what I see then”.
And off she goes.
A deep, profound discussion about my life. My job. My relationships. The next three months. My family. No question unanswered, no stone left unturned, some uneasy responses….
I hang up the phone with a feeling that I’ve had a deep, much-needed discussion with one of my best friends.
Except that my best friends have known me for years, and that this woman, despite everything she’s said about my life and that felt so right, barely knows me.
And yes, maybe she’s so receptive that she simply told me what I wanted to hear, but that doesn’t matter.
The greatest gift from that call was how calm I felt afterwards.
Maybe it was indeed the perfect message from an omniscient force who knows what’s best for me.
Maybe, I guided the conversation towards what I really wanted.
Maybe, just by telling me that her guides recommend I take a specific path, she’s helped me imagine a future life where it is already happening, where the decision is made, where there’s no drama about it.
But it looks like I wasn’t convinced enough.
Because 2 days later, on the small and dark terrace of a crowded Parisian cafe a man comes to me and says “You like to sing, don’t you?”.
Turns out he’s a medium too.
And again, we are off. As the evening advances, surrounded with smoke and the laughter of drunk couples around us slowly moving closer to each other, he speaks to me. My childhood, my parents, my loves, my dreams, the person who’s protected me…
Do mediums flirt?
Is it their easiest way to pick up naive and lonely girls?
He assured me it’s not – and that the life of a medium is not easy, between those who see you as freak show, and those who mistrust you.
So if we follow the reasoning to the end, despite never being in contact with the medium world before, in the course of 2 days I had 2 people coming to me with messages from beyond.
Apparently there was a very pressing message that I needed to hear.
I guess the best way to close that adventure would to find my own way to communicate with myself. To find answers from within, and not delegate my decision making powers to someone else.
Maybe that will come later on.
I feel calmer though. It was nice, the feeling of being deeply loved and understood by those 2 people.
So if you’re an artist faced with the dark purgatory of indecision, why not ask for guidance from someone whose job it is to connect you with your higher self.
Then you can decide what you leave and what you keep.